Vegan Cornbread

This isn't "raw" vegan because it's being cooked in the oven, but it's still offensively good. If you like really dense but light, unsweet cornbread, this is for yoself mere mortal.

Vegan Cornbread
Ingredients:

2 cups cornmeal
3/4 can yellow corn
1 cup whole wheat flour
2 cups unsweetened almond milk
1/3 cup canola oil
2 tsp baking powder
2 tbsp honey or maple syrup
2 tsp apple cider vinegar
1/2 tsp salt
1/4 cup brown flax seeds


-Step one: mix the apple cider vinegar and the almond milk. You've gotta curd that bitch. Whip it good. Don't forget the honey or the maple syrup to the wet mixture, like I did almost did. If you do this, you will catch the pox.

-Next: In a separate bowl mix the dry ingredients. Mix together the 2 cups cornmeal, whole wheat flour, can of yellow corn (I only used 3/4 of the can), and baking powder together. Add the canola oil to this mixture as well. Beat ittttttttt.

-Now: we're getting funky. What, jackass? I love cornbread. Mix the wet and dry ingredients together. I'm not even going to say it, but you know what I think this looks like.

-Next: You can add the flax seeds if you want to/have them. I add flax seeds to everything because they have OMEGA-3s and they're supposed to make you less of a moron. Honestly, it hasn't worked out that well for me so far, so. Up to you.

-Next: Put the entire mixture into a 9x13 (or whatever else you have, come on) pan lined with parchment paper. If you grease it, do it with oil not buttah. Otherwise it won't be vegan, yo. Parchment paper requires less clean up =win. And it gives the bread a cool texture.

Jesus, I can't write comments on every photo. Are you really concerned? Um... look. Here it is again from a different angle. I can take cool artistic shots of food. Except substitute "cool" and "artistic" for "desperate" and "needy for attention."

-Bake for 35 mins on 350 degree heat. If you keep it in for less, the inside texture might be a little grainy. No one likes grains. Not even their mothers.

-I think this tastes really good drizzled w/honey or jam. But what do I know, I eat vegan food so it's probably all disgusting in general. Thanks, critic.