Vegan Cashew Nut 'Cheese'

I was on the Whole Foods website (loser) and I found their recipe section, and in it, voila, this recipe.

I have read about a ga-zillion recipes for raw vegan cheese, which calls for the soaking of nuts, and a long process of letting it sit for days and days and years, and wrapping it in cheesecloth and about a million other things I am FAR too lazy to achieve. If I were an animal, I would ALWAYS be the roadkill on the highway, probably because I was walking too slow.

Anyway, now that we're talking about road kill, let's make some food:

This is like an easy version of raw vegan cheese, using cashew (bless you) butter instead of soaked nuts. I had no nutritional yeast, (different from baking yeast, infused with B vitamins and gives a really 'cheesy' flavor to vegan/vegetarian dishes), so I dicked around with the recipe a little to make it work regardless.

Now you don't need to ask the grocery store worker if they have "nutrional yeast," and get pointed to the feminine hygiene aisle, if you don't want to.

Vegan Cashew Nut 'Cheese'

adaption of Whole Foods recipe

1 cup of cashew butter

1/4 cup unsweetend almond milk

2 tablespoons of tahini

4 tsp of apple cider vinegar

1/2 tsp of onion powder
1 tsp garlic

3/4 tsp salt

1/2 tsp white pepper

-All you have to do is throw everything into a food processor and you're done. Yay!

-The downside to all of this is that in their pure forms, all the ingredients look startlingly close to catfood. I honestly might have thrown up if I looked at it too long. This is the least cat-food looking shot of the bunch. See? I do care about you.

-Thankfully I didn't have to look at it too long. I think this is awesome to put on bagels or whatever.

-My little dog Taz fell asleep in my arms when I was singing to him Complainte du la Butte. I think he's sick today. What does this have to do with cooking? Well, nothing, you heartless bastard.